Tuesday, April 26, 2011

A Conversation

Credit Card Customer Service Representative: Hello, Mr. FLG. Thank you for calling the fraud alert line. I'll need you to provide some information to verify your identify.

FLG duly verifies his identity.

Credit Card Customer Service Representative: Thank you, Mr. FLG. I see that you tried to buy a plane ticket for $1,800 just a few moments ago, but it was denied. Is that why you are calling?

FLG: As a matter of fact, it is. I need to buy that ticket.

Credit Card Customer Service Representative: Sorry for the inconvenience, Mr. FLG. But we strive to detect fraud before it occurs.

FLG: I'm totally on-board with that. If I have to call every time I make an $1,800 purchase I am totally fine with that. I'm glad you're keeping my account safe. No problem.

Credit Card Customer Service Representative: Oh, no, Mr. FLG. It wasn't the $1,800 plane ticket. That was simply the first transaction after the fraud. Were you aware of a $9.89 charge this afternoon at 12:47 PM at a place called Sweet-something.

FLG: Yeah, that was the salad I had for lunch. Wait. Are you telling me that the $1,800 ticket? No problem. My salad? Red flags.

Credit Card Customer Service Representative: We have a highly-advanced fraud detection system.

FLG: Right. I think I'd prefer the less advanced system of -- $1,800 international plane ticket? Let's have Mr. FLG give us a call. 9 bucks? No big deal.

1 comment:

The Ancient said...

I had a conversation much like that several years ago. (I remember it as The Day I Stopped Using Visa.) I really don't see why I should find myself in a colloquy with some busybody in the Midwest about my grocery bill. Ever.

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